Author Topic: JOKE OF THE DAY  (Read 6712 times)

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Offline customguitar

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JOKE OF THE DAY
« on: December 11, 2009, 03:53:24 pm »
did you hear the one about the grasshopper that walked into a bar and the bar-tender says " Hey, did you know that there is a drink named after you?" and the grasshopper says " Really?, Theres a drink named Steve?" ;D

c'mon, you gotta laff at that one :madness:
HAMER STEVE STEVENS
KRAMER 1984 BARETTA
KRAMER GORKY PARK
IBANEZ RG 321
IBANEZ RG 320
IBANEZ RG 321
DIGITECH RP 250
DIGITECH BRIAN MAY RED SPECIAL
BOSS GT 6
PEAVEY BACKSTAGE 50

Offline Jerryman

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Re: JOKE OF THE DAY
« Reply #1 on: December 11, 2009, 04:24:47 pm »
OVERHEARD AT DAIRY QUEEN;


Man: "I'll have a sundae please"

DQ girl "you want crushed nuts?"

Man "you want your tits bit off?"
The Norton won't tame anything.  A fantastic pickup, it will make your LP sound like a wild mongoose who is piloting a F-22 raptor and smoking crystal meth

Offline CityofBlindingLights

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Re: JOKE OF THE DAY
« Reply #2 on: December 11, 2009, 05:56:36 pm »
A physicist, a biologist, and a mathematician are standing outside a building. They watch two people walk in, and three people walk out.

The physicist says: "That's experimental error; we can discard this information."

The biologist says: "That's proof of reproduction!"

The mathematician says: "If one person walks in, the building will be empty."

Offline kareemb0

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Re: JOKE OF THE DAY
« Reply #3 on: December 14, 2009, 12:42:29 pm »
How do you call a dinosaur that's had an Indian Curry?

-  Megasoreass
Quote from: DiMarzio.com
Have you ever heard a bridge pickup that made a guitar sound like a giant mosquito attack? If you've run into this problem, The Tone ZoneŽ is the solution sell your Boss Metal Zone 2.

Offline darkbluemurder

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Re: JOKE OF THE DAY
« Reply #4 on: June 03, 2014, 08:39:42 am »
What is the inscript on the tombstone of a blues musician?


... I didn't wake up this morning ...
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Offline darkbluemurder

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Re: JOKE OF THE DAY
« Reply #5 on: June 04, 2014, 06:13:28 am »
How many country singers does it take to replace a light bulb?




Five. One replaces the bulb and four sing about how beautiful the old one was.
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Offline darkbluemurder

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Re: JOKE OF THE DAY
« Reply #6 on: June 05, 2014, 04:15:03 am »
Three lawyers are riding in a balloon and have lost orientation. After a while they see a group of people on the ground so they shout: "Where are we?" The people on the ground shout back: "In the balloon."

Puzzled and confused the lawyers in the balloon think long and hard about what kind of people they saw on the ground. Then one speaks up: "They must have been lawyers. The answer came fast, was correct to the point but was not really useful."
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Offline darkbluemurder

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Re: JOKE OF THE DAY
« Reply #7 on: June 06, 2014, 03:37:43 am »
Question: what makes two plus two?

Answer: depends on who you ask.

Mathematician: four.

Medical doctor: I believe it is four but you may want to get a second opinion.

Lawyer: I believe it is four but you will never know what the courts decide.

Certified Public Accountant: what do you want as result?
Own: Area 67, Area 61, Area 58, VV Pro 54, Injector n, HB2, Cruisers, VSolo, SDS-1, Area T set, Virtual Hot T, Chopper, Chopper T, Bluesbucker, Breed set, Air Norton, Super D, DLX+, DLX-90, DP240, DP198, VHPAF, AT-1, Morse set
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Offline darkbluemurder

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Re: JOKE OF THE DAY
« Reply #8 on: June 12, 2014, 11:03:00 am »
The difference between a jazz guitarist and a rock guitarist?

The rock guitarist plays three chords before an audience of 1000 ...
Own: Area 67, Area 61, Area 58, VV Pro 54, Injector n, HB2, Cruisers, VSolo, SDS-1, Area T set, Virtual Hot T, Chopper, Chopper T, Bluesbucker, Breed set, Air Norton, Super D, DLX+, DLX-90, DP240, DP198, VHPAF, AT-1, Morse set
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Offline darkbluemurder

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Re: JOKE OF THE DAY
« Reply #9 on: June 13, 2014, 06:27:18 am »
A jazz musician goes to the doctor. The doctor hesitantly tells him: "You have only three months to live." The jazz musician is utterly shocked: "And on what?"
Own: Area 67, Area 61, Area 58, VV Pro 54, Injector n, HB2, Cruisers, VSolo, SDS-1, Area T set, Virtual Hot T, Chopper, Chopper T, Bluesbucker, Breed set, Air Norton, Super D, DLX+, DLX-90, DP240, DP198, VHPAF, AT-1, Morse set
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Offline darkbluemurder

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Re: JOKE OF THE DAY
« Reply #10 on: June 23, 2014, 07:27:25 am »
A skeleton visits the doctor. Doctor: "Why couldn't you have come earlier?"
Own: Area 67, Area 61, Area 58, VV Pro 54, Injector n, HB2, Cruisers, VSolo, SDS-1, Area T set, Virtual Hot T, Chopper, Chopper T, Bluesbucker, Breed set, Air Norton, Super D, DLX+, DLX-90, DP240, DP198, VHPAF, AT-1, Morse set
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Offline darkbluemurder

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Re: JOKE OF THE DAY
« Reply #11 on: July 08, 2014, 03:56:24 am »
What is the last thought of a mathematician before dying?

I didn't figure this out.
Own: Area 67, Area 61, Area 58, VV Pro 54, Injector n, HB2, Cruisers, VSolo, SDS-1, Area T set, Virtual Hot T, Chopper, Chopper T, Bluesbucker, Breed set, Air Norton, Super D, DLX+, DLX-90, DP240, DP198, VHPAF, AT-1, Morse set
Owned: PAF Pro, Fred, Mega Drive, HS-1, HS-3T, Shock Wave set, Tone Zone